GET YOUR LOVE SOFTWARE RIGHT

When most people claim to be working on their love lives, what they are mostly doing is working on the hardware and not the software of their love lives. Working on the hardware could mean trying hard to be more attractive to your lover. The truth however is that fixing the external doesn’t necessarily guarantee that everything will be alright. Continue reading

Advertisements

HOW NOT TO TRADE WHAT YOU NEED FOR WHAT YOU WANT IN LOVE

The biggest conflict you may have to face in love, is the conflict between what you need and what you want. To put it another way,the greatest challenge you may have to face in love is the battle between who you need,and who you want. One writer brightly declares that success is getting what you want,while fulfillment is wanting what you’ve got. Not everyone who gets what they want in love, eventually end up wanting what they’ve gotten. Continue reading

HOW TO BE IRRESISTIBLE

Have you ever wondered why some people with less than glamorous looks tend to secure the attention and commitment of their lover for a long period of time, even years? While some more attractive people struggle with finding anyone to commit to them for the long term? The answer is R-E-S-P-E-C-T. We all cannot seem to resist or ignore genuine respect for us. Continue reading

5 WAYS TO HANDLE LOVE DISSAPOINTMENTS

disappointmentThey broke your heart,cheated on you,betrayed your trust and undermined your love for them. Such situations aren’t strange in our postmodern love jungles. If you couldn’t successfully prevent such love disappointments from happening,what matters now is how you are going to handle it. Such love disappointments have caused negative tipping points in people’s lives primarily because they developed one of these three attitudes to their subsequent lovers. Continue reading

LOVE ISN’T WORTH A THING WITHOUT IT

Some things are more important than love because possessing love without them is bound to be catastrophic. I call them love’s foundations. Earlier we dealt with friendship and self awareness, today we turn to the subject of character. If you have ever loved a character deficient individual, you can bear me witness that it is one of the most emotionally frustrating scenarios in love. To understand character we must give some working definitions. Continue reading

KNOWING ME, LOVING YOU

Love is not self existent. Love requires certain foundations to flourish. One of those foundations is what we talked about yesterday, friendship. A second foundation is self awareness. This is the essence of our contemplation today. A lot of people jump from relationship to relationship without a fundamental understanding of their identity. Little wonder why such relationships fail. I personally made this mistake in my early years in the university. I jumped into a five year relationship without an inherent understanding of who I was or where I was going. The outcome was catastrophic. Continue reading

FRIENDSHIP FIRST PLEASE, LOVE ME LATER

True love is first evolutionary, before it is revolutionary. Revolutionary love is the kind that takes your world by storm, sweeps you off your feet and turns your world right side up or upside down. When most of us claim we are looking for love, this romantic elixir is what we are yearning for. The truth however is that even if you find revolutionary love,it seldom lasts because it isn’t practically sustainable. What most of us fail to realize is that, the Hollywood directors, actors and romantic writers who have so publicized revolutionary love,won’t be struggling with their relationships, if they really understood what love was about. Continue reading

HOW TO MAKE YOUR LOVE WRONGS RIGHT

No matter how much you love your partner, offenses must come. The only thing common to all ex relationships is their inability to handle hurts and offenses. Owing to the fact that we are humans,none of us can be right 100% of the time. In practice the pendulum of rights and wrongs oscillate between both couples from time to time. If your partner is being wrong all of the time, you probably chose someone way below your league of maturity. If your particular partner is right all of the time, you probably chose someone way above your league. In a love among equals scenario,it will shift between couples from time to time. Continue reading

WHY LOVE MUST BE TOUGH

ToughLove-BlogDoes the fact that you are in love, mean you have to put up with every awkward thing that your lover offers? Love may claim to be a lot of things, but love is not stupid. It isn’t uncommon to see so called lovers who throw caution to the wind and endure untold abuses all in the name of love. This ought not be so. Continue reading