Singleness is not a curse,in fact, it can be an awesome blessing. My last two articles must have erroneously communicated the idea that it is unfortunate to remain single. Nothing can be further from the truth. They might also have communicated the idea that it takes being in a relationship to be happy. That is also not true. There are many singles who are more happy than their involved counterparts. It is characteristic of me to seek for balance in all my writings, so today’s article is my attempt at that.My mentor the Revered Gbeminiyi Eboda of (LMI) said years ago that it is better to be a single without wrinkles, than to be a double with troubles. I agree. You are better off remaining single, if you can’t seem to find a credible partner. You are better off single, if the relationship you have is marring you and not making you. You are better off single, if the relationship you are in is a fountain of unhappiness and lack of fulfillment. In short, you are better off single, if your relationship makes you less than more. The following are some credible benefits attached to being single.
THE PRIVILEGE OF PROFESSIONAL FOCUS: Most responsibly single people do have the capacity to roll out unprecedented volumes of work, because they don’t have to share their time with any other person. They are able to give themselves undistractedly to their work without any partner nagging for their attention. Some of the most professionally effective people I know are singles. The list of outstanding celibates are endless. I doubt if some of these individuals would have been as effective as they were, if they were in a relationship.
- THE PRIVILEGE OF NON-ACCOUNTABILITY: In reality accountability is a must in all thriving relationships. A single person does live without the burden of accountability. No one has to be told where you are going, or when you will be back. No one has to know how you allocate your resources as a whole. This could be a huge relief for many, especially if they had been with insecure and controlling partners who wanted to know everything about them. Those who value personal privacy over emotional piracy would love this privilege of singleness.
- THE PRIVILEGE OF SWIFT DECISION MAKING AND AGILITY OF ACTIONS: Singles have no need to make consultations and pursue consensus before decisions and actions are taken. This isn’t so for those of us married. Depending on how much of a control freak your partner is, you might have to run every major decision through your partner, before you can take them. There is also no guarantee that they will sign off on the decision after that. This compulsory process in all responsible relationships have a tendency to slow down the pace at which things are done.
- THE PRIVILEGE OF RESOURCE CONSERVATION: Relationships are quite expensive to maintain. This doesn’t only involves financial resources, it includes the time, materials and energies involved in making it work. A single person has none of such cares and obligations. They only need care for themselves. As such singles should be able to do a better job at saving their resources than those of us who are involved.
THE PRIVILEGE OF CHOICE: When confronted with better information most couples,particularly married ones feel stuck,because their marital choices have already been made. Even when they consider leaving,it isn’t easy because of children and public opinion. This is quite understandable. However for singles, their choice is ahead of them and not behind them. This choice is the biggest asset and privilege of being single. It must not be taken lightly. The singles who waste their right to choose on unworthy partners will have themselves to blame eventually. The choice of who to be with is a single person’s greatest chance at determining their future.
If these five benefits of singleness mean more to you than having a partner with you,you are better off remaining happily single for the rest of your life. Conversely do not go into a relationship without sacrificing these five things for the well being of your relationship. You can’t eat your cake and have it. The choice is yours.
THE GREATEST IS LOVE
Love Dynamics Global
Enthronement Assembly Lagos
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